In explaining the nature of union to me, He said:
1. “Don’t think, daughter, that union lies in being very close to me. For those, too, who offend me are close, although they may not want to be. Neither does it consist in favors and consolations in prayer, even though these may reach a very sublime degree. Though these favors may come from Me, they are often a means for winning souls, even souls that are not in the state of grace.”
I was experiencing a lofty elevation of the spirit when I heard those words. The Lord gave me understanding of what spirit was and in what state my soul then was and how to understand the words of the Magnificat, Exultavit spiritus meus.1 I wouldn’t know how to describe this experience. It seems to me I was given an understanding that the spirit is the higher part of the will.
2. Getting back to union, I understood that it consists in the spirit being pure and raised above all earthly things so that there is nothing in the soul that wants to turn aside from God’s will; but there is such conformity with God in spirit and will, and detachment from everything, and involvement with Him, that there is no thought of love of self or of any creature.
3. I have thought: if this is union, then we can say of a soul that invariably has determination like this that it is always in the prayer of union. It is true that this prayer of union lasts only a short while. It occurred to me that with respect to walking in uprightness, meriting, and making progress, union does last; but it cannot be said that the soul is in union as it is when in contemplation. It seems to me I understood, although not by words, that the dust of our misery, faults, and impediments, in which we again immerse ourselves, is so great that it would be impossible to have the purity the spirit has when it is joined to God; for the spirit then leaves and rises above our wretched misery. And it seems to me that if this experience is union, that is, our will and spirit being thus made one with God’s, it is impossible for anyone who is not in the state of grace to have it; for I have been told it is. So it would seem to me very difficult, unless by a special grace from God, to understand when there is union since we cannot know when we are in the state of grace.
4. Will Your Reverence2 write me your opinion and let me know where I am mistaken, and send this paper back to me.